the old back and forth 

She regrets knowing what GTL is and wants to see the world through a childs eyes. Hi, Someone once told me that I maintain a child-like wonder. I was impressed by this phrase and shocked by the next thing they said which was, “You’re too big to be in my blanket fort.” Four year olds […]

feeling bitter? 

The following are quotes from a profile. Clearly this person likes it rough. She wants to be humiliated and flogged and don’t worry, I didn’t send these¬†responses. “If I could be any fruit, I would be a kiwi. Ask me why and tell me what you would be & why if you’d like to know […]

Lusophone, it’s a word 

She likes the sound of Portuguese and the word betwixt. Hi, I met a lovely Lusophone once. It was in Rio. He put a knife up to my throat and then he screamed at me. I don’t speak Portuguese so I don’t really know if he was mugging me or not. He might have been […]

Top 5 ways to get out of a bad date 

Hi there. You’ve studied the OK Stupid site, crafted the perfect message and landed a date. Ear hairs are plucked, and your body is perfumed in a bath of chemical companies such as Fragrance and Urea. Date time arrives and your online suitor is not quite what you expected. Here are the top 5 ways […]

train surfin 

She likes to Subway surf. Hi, Have you tried balancing on the L when it leaves Manhattan and heads toward the world of the waxed mustaches? It’s a challenge. You own kitty cat socks? You must have really small feet. That was dumb joke. Cheers I once dated a woman with large feet. They were […]