{"id":439,"date":"2011-09-29T10:20:37","date_gmt":"2011-09-29T15:20:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.aguidetoselfsabotage.com\/?p=439"},"modified":"2011-09-29T10:20:37","modified_gmt":"2011-09-29T15:20:37","slug":"online-dating-letter-47","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.aguidetoselfsabotage.com\/2011\/09\/29\/online-dating-letter-47\/","title":{"rendered":"online dating letter #47"},"content":{"rendered":"

She doesn’t like baseball, can charm a customs agent and schedules time to eat cookies.<\/em><\/p>\n

Hi,<\/p>\n

With only an estimated 97.5 years on the planet you should not be wasting any time of it on baseball. I watched a game once when I was 12. It ended when I was… shit, I don’t think it ever ended. Who could tell if it ever ends?<\/p>\n

I’ve lived without most things and it is nice, but a toothbrush is key. That’s what separates us from people who watch baseball.<\/p>\n

I could have used your custom agent charm a few years ago. A large Tongan custom official wanted a bribe. I was slow to catch on. For punishment he made me watch baseball.<\/p>\n

Clearly you are much too advanced for me – I’ve never thought to schedule a specific cookie time. But if you think a person that eats cookies at unspecified intervals might hold some interest for you then I’m here.<\/p>\n

I hold out hope for this one. Maybe she has a scheduled time to send replies that has yet to occur.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

She doesn’t like baseball, can charm a customs agent and schedules time to eat cookies. Hi, With only an estimated 97.5 years on the planet you should not be wasting any time of it on baseball. I watched a game once when I was 12. 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